Fallout

Ok, I can't deny it anymore. Fall is definitely here. Like there was any doubt, right? Right, but since my SAD gives me the ability to feel Fall a minimum of two to three weeks before everyone else, I try to pretend it's not here for as long as possible. For those of you who don't know, SAD is Seasonal Affective Disorder. (I always found the acronym ironic. What sicko came up with this?) I've never been officially diagnosed, as I have an out-of-the-ordinary case in that it affects me in the Fall. Most cases affect people in the winter. Something about the clouds and lack of sunshine as well as freezing temperatures that bring people down. Plus the snow. If you ask me, those aren't the worst things in the world. I actually start to feel better when the first snow falls. And for those of you in the Wyoming/Utah area who are saying "well, you should be fine then since it has now snowed twice in the last two weeks" - wrong. I don't mean snow in the mountains. I mean it needs to at least cover the valley floor. An inch is good. More is better. THAT'S when I'll start feeling better.

I hate Fall. I mean I really, REALLY hate Fall. But I know there are people out there who absolutely LOVE the Fall. My dad is one. My friend Emilee is another. Although, Em's "Birthday Season" is in the Fall, so I think she has a valid reason. (For explanations of the "Birthday Season", please check out Em's blog: http://wagnermania.blogspot.com/. Her Sept. 21 entry explains it all.) If my birthday was in the Fall, maybe I would have a different opinion as well. The fact of the matter is, I can't think of one single thing that's good about the Fall. To me it just means endings. All the vegitation dies, animals get ready to hybernate, the weather cools off, hunting season begins.

--A word on that for just a minute. I have nothing against hunting. I don't do it myself, mainly because tromping around in the cold of early dawn (or before) out in the middle of massive areas of sagebrush doing my best to be quiet while dealing with my horrific Fall allergies all the while searching for something to kill is not my idea of a good time. (Did I mention I'm not a morning person? And that I'm allergic to sagebrush? That's irony for you, a Wyoming girl who is allergic to sagebrush.) I do like wild meat quite a bit, and am more than willing to eat it. It's just the activity of hunting that I don't care for, and just one more sign to me that Fall is a seasons of endings.--

I dislike everything about Fall, right down to the colors. Yes, I am referring to the "beautiful" colors of the Fall leaves. Please remember that I grew up in Wyoming, where Fall colors amount to yellow and brown. No reds, no oranges, just yellow and brown. Sometimes yellow speckled with brown. (Now you know where the Wyoming Cowboys got their color scheme.) However, throwing red and orange into the mix didn't help things for me. I still don't like them. But it's not just the leaves that change colors. The sky changes, too, and is somehow a deeper shade of blue. Even the very air around us, turns a different color - a kind of pale yellow, if you're interested. If you've never been tuned in to nature enough to notice these things, I do suggest you slow down long enough to pay attention, even just once. As much as I don't like being able to see and sense these things, it is quite an amazing thing to see how much the world changes in such a small window of time.

The Fall also means homesickness for me. As I've said, I grew up in Southwest Wyoming, Rock Springs to be exact. I now live in Utah. But whenever Fall comes around I start missing home. In the worst way. My family still lives there, and they all know when Fall has come, whether they can see it or not, because my trips home become more frequent (whether they like it or not!) Why is this, you ask? I don't know. Wish I did. My mom suggests that the first real homesickness I ever had was when I left for college the Fall of 1994 (ouch, has it been that long?) and maybe that is why I'm homesick every year at the same time. Someone else suggested to me that Fall is a season where things turn inward. People do the same and perhaps I don't like what I see. Maybe, I don't know. All I know is it's a horrible time of year and I can't wait until it's over.

Even so, I still do the ridiculous things that come with the season. I put out Fall decorations, a wreath on my door, a festive fall candle, even a teddy bear holding a pumpkin. How silly is this? Decorations for a season I hate in colors I hate. I've even gone so far as to seriously consider buying a cross stitch or two in the Fall theme. Let's be clear on that - CONSIDERED buying. I have yet to actually give in and buy one, and when I do who knows if I'll actually stitch it or not. But the consideration is pretty monumental for me. Resistance is futile?

I even do things such as make and drink Spiced Tea (by the gallons) and bake. Fall is the season for my zuchinni bread. And as much as I like to do these things, I have figured out that they are things that link me to home. The smells of cinnimon and cloves from the tea, and baking zuchinni bread take me home again. Especially since it was in my mom's kitchen that I developed my recipe for zuchinni bread, and first tasted Spiced Tea.

Truthfully, I'm not even especially fond of Halloween. WHAT?!? Sacrilege, right? It only has to do with when the holiday falls, nothing else. And, Halloween to me arrives at the end of the season, since most of my Halloween costumes as a kid were made to fit over a snowsuit. (Hey, I grew up in the Rockies.) I must say Halloween is getting better for me, though, since I've had a child. She enjoys it so much, it's really hard for me not to. Besides, how can you look out at a sea of vampires, princesses, devils and angels and not like what you see?

So what was the point of all of this, right? We've established that I hate the Fall, but so what? Nothing, really. Just one of those days that I struggled, so I thought I'd vent a little. And now you know me a little better, I guess. Now I realize that my post today was not so entertaining and thought-provoking as anything I've written prior, and I apologize. So, to make it up to you I would like to direct your attention to someone who seems to always be entertaining. Some of you may have already been introduced to this lady when I forwarded her eBay listing for the Pokemon cards. However, her blog is so much more hilarious, I have to share. This woman is truly my idol, and I hope I can write like she does someday!! Her name is Dawn Meehan, and the site really is worth a look-see: http://www.mom2my6pack.blogspot.com/. So, Happy Fall to everyone. HA!


P.S. Now a shameless plug: most of you are probably aware that October is Breast Cancer Awareness month. Most of you are probably also aware that my mom is a breast cancer surviver of nearly two years now. Needless to say, this is a cause I support and would appreciate it if you do, too. As you are out shopping, please note all of the products out there this month that will donate to breast cancer research with their purchase. If you are a consumer of these products, I ask you to purchase this month. A few I have noticed: Yoplait (though you have to mail in the lids on this one), M&M's, TicTacs and General Mills products. I wouldn't necessarily recommend the travel mugs from Einsteins Bagels, though. There is a donation with each purchase, but the mugs themselves are $18, and I believe the donation is $1.50 or less per mug. I have also added a link to my blog that allows you to click daily, which in turn prompts the site sponsor to pay for mammograms. The site is http://www.breastcancersite.com/. It also has a store you can purchase from, and has links to other causes such as child health, literacy and hunger. (Sorry, though, I only have the capacity to support one cause at a time!) This month if the clicks equal 500 mammograms, the sponsors will fund an additional 150, so please click away! Also, if you just wish to donate outright, the Susan G. Komen for the Cure foundation is a dedicated organization who raises money for breast cancer research only. I have added a site link for the foundation as well. Thanks to all of you who take the time to read my reandom musings, and I hope you will take a moment more to help in the fight against breast cancer.

*Disclaimer: the addition of the Susan G. Komen for the Cure link is not intended in any way to imply that this blog is endorsed, sponsored or otherwise supported by the Komen organization. I have no affiliation with the organization and simply wish to support the cause.